Meanderings

I spend my life in a flux between bored, burnt out, tired, languished, beaten. It's not that I don't have the energy -- I still go to the gym, run, play tennis, hike, and take long evening walks.

Today, my Labrador Nemo and I took a long walk in Powder Springs, GA. First we walked the beautiful passive park, which is usually under water. Then we walked Powder Springs City Park. Much to my surprise, there is a new road and parking lot that comes in behind the park, so we walked down that. The new road runs alongside the mayor's highway to nowhere.

It was dead quiet going down the road -- hardly any people or signs of life. I love taking walks in my flip flops, and I just flip flopped down the uncompleted road. The road has been cut through a once deep forest, and I walked down there. I saw some wetlands and I stopped, and listened to the crickets chirping and frogs croaking.

When my time comes, when I face my Waterloo, I won't create a lot of drama. I will just keep doing what I've always done, until I drop.

Games

Every thought of the supernatural is something we create in our heads and reflect upon the stars. It's the Jesus drug that helps us get through. The idea of some invisible person who is always with us, loving us, caring for us, etc. feels really darn good. It's much better to do the Jesus drug or any other drug than to face the empty reality known as life.

Our illusions and delusions become our best friends. Denial and our ability to lie to ourselves becomes our comforting force. We play our mind games, and they give us some comfort, and reality be damned.

My observation lately is that humans are far less intelligent than I had assumed. People really can't think out any "big picture" concept. We all have our little agendas, and that is what drives us. Unfortunately, all of our agendas conflict with everyone else's agendas, so everything is deadlocked and nothing really happens in the world.

It's all a vicious game.